Most Empaths will have at least one toxic person in their life that can cause a wave of intense, negative emotions to rain down, just by being in their presence. These people, who may be a friend or family member, seem to spew venom when they talk which can be felt in any of the main energy centres (chakras), especially on the front torso, in the form of an ache or pain.
Typical sensations which can be felt by being with toxic people:
- Anger or feelings of bitterness embodying you: This can last for the duration of being in their presence and up to 10 days after. Depending on the negative traits they carry will depend on what you feel.
- Fatigue: Struggling to keep your eyes open, especially if they are venting.
- Being out of sorts: A range of strange feelings wash over you, from being spaced out, to nausea.
- Negative talk: Finding yourself talking negatively of others, even though it is not a typical trait of yours. Overly toxic people can easily lure the unvigilant Empath into their judgmental behavior.
- Apathy: Losing all previous zest and optimism.
A toxic friend will probably be a family member or lifelong friend and because of this you have a natural fear of letting them go, not least because you probably love them. Chances are, you have already tried helping them by sharing what has helped you, in dealing with the rigors of life. Sadly, they do not want to hear or listen to what you have to say about any kind of self-help, preferring to offload their negative rants on you. You may have also tried getting them to see situations from different perspectives, hoping they may recognize that by changing their attitude and outlook, it would change their whole life…to no avail.
The Empath would never want to hurt or cause unnecessary pain to others and it is for this reason, many keep in their lives, those who cause much emotional pain. Yet, one must always put the emotional health of self-first. If you know a food or substance made you violently ill or caused you to feel depressed, you would avoid it; the same should be applied to those who cause emotional turmoil. We have a responsibility to keep our bodies and mental wellbeing strong and healthy, and if another is causing us damage (all stress will eventually lead to illness), it is our duty to either confront the said person or remove them from our life.
I am not talking about having our ego’s dented by another’s random disrespect. We all have people who offend, hurt or make us angry, by their lack of understanding, at some point. And we in turn will no doubt do the same to others. This issue is about those toxic friends or family members who repetitively bring you down and do immense energetic damage. It can be so intense that you know exactly when they are having negative thoughts about you.
For the Empath, navigating friendships can be a grey area, as most people will invoke an emotional response within. It is often the kindest of people in whom we feel the most pain. Yet feeling another’s pain is nothing compared to what some can make us endure. The point will come in toxic friendships when one has to decide if it is causing more harm than good.
Here are some questions to ask yourself that may help evaluate your friend/relationship and hopefully help you see if it is a healthy one: